Family has always been the foundation of our lives, bringing us love, support, and that feelin' of belonging. But life sometimes throws curveballs, and we find ourselves takin' on roles we never thought we'd have. Today, I wanna share my personal journey as an auntie holdin' it down for my nieces while their mama is locked up. It hasn’t been easy, being single, workin' full time, and livin' in a small apartment, but the joy and love them girls bring to my life make it all worth it.

I am terrified to post this, but I know that I can’t pretend that all is perfect and well. I also know that there are lots of families who are in the exact same place that we are. You are not alone, I see you. 

I’ve been with him here before; sitting on a hard bench with a judge staring down. 

Last time, he sat beside me holding a toy truck while his sturdy legs swung back and forth, and back and forth in the adult chair. I remember that he kept tipping his head toward mine and would reach and pat my cheek with his chubby, toddler fingers.

Today, I want to pour my heart out about the extraordinary journey my family and I have embarked on – parenting an adopted child who has experienced foster care. It's been a rollercoaster ride of emotions, challenges, and heartwarming moments that have reshaped our lives in ways we never could have imagined.

When we made the decision to adopt, we were aware that our path might not be as straightforward as traditional parenting. We understood that our child's past experiences might shape their behaviors and emotions in unexpected ways. Yet, we couldn't have anticipated just how deeply foster care would leave its mark on our little one's heart.

I have been raising my nieces for 15 years now. I can say that this has been the most challenging thing I have ever done but I’m so grateful to be doing it. It has given me so much experience in raising children who are now teenagers. I couldn’t be more proud of my girls. 

I’ve never felt anxiety at this capacity before. As a parent prior to foster care, I have worried if my children will make good friends, good choices, go to college, etc. But I have never had a crippling fear of failure for my children until we adopted, and now I am constantly at war with myself, wondering if I am the one failing. Am I too hard, too easy, have them involved enough, putting too much on their plate, speaking of plates should I cut out red 40 dye or is their hyperactivity simply because they are freshly turned 4 years old?

Fui mamá Foster por casi 18 meses de 6 niños no tenía idea de cómo ser mamá pero con el tiempo aprendí pasaron muchas cosas lloré muchas veces me sentía derrotada muchas Veces pero cada día que pasaba me enamoraba más de los niños y ese amor que tenía por los niños me ayudaba a seguir adelante cada vez que sentía que no podía más .

There are moments in life that shake us to our core, and this past year has been one such chapter in our family's story. As I sit down to write this, I'm overwhelmed by a mix of emotions, but mostly, I feel an indescribable sense of gratitude and hope. Our journey took a detour when our daughter made the heart-wrenching decision to run away in search of her first mom, who we believe is currently living on the streets. 

Today marks the beginning of a chapter that I never anticipated, one where my home opens its doors to my beloved nieces, Lily and Emma. The air is filled with mixed emotions as we prepare to navigate this transition during the holiday season.

Life as I knew it took a sudden turn when my sister passed away, leaving behind three beautiful kids. Faced with the choice of letting them enter the foster care system or taking on the responsibility myself, I chose the latter, setting the stage for a journey I never anticipated.